Categories: Thoughts

by hannah

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Categories: ThoughtsPublished On: June 30th, 2023

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Many queer couples feel excluded by elements of the wedding industry, so here are three things for suppliers to consider about their service…

As a queer person, I’ve seen the wedding industry from both sides: as a supplier; and when I tied the knot with my gorgeous wife Becca.

I’ve said before that I don’t think the majority of wedding suppliers are intentionally homophobic; but that sometimes perhaps they leave stories of queer love out of their marketing, or don’t think enough about how to adapt their service to make it more inclusive.

So for Pride Month 2023, I’ve put together a list of three things I think wedding suppliers can do to improve their service for LGBT+ couples…

 

Don’t make assumptions about the couples you work with

Humans make assumptions about things all the time.

But when you’re a queer couple getting married, it can get a little tiring having to correct suppliers about what pronouns you use, or that ‘actually no we’re not planning to walk down the aisle’.

Instead of putting the onus on them to correct your assumptions, just have an open mind and ask them what they’ve got planned for their wedding day.

And many of the wedding traditions just don’t work for queer couples, so it’s even more important to take the guessing game out of it, and just ask.

Image from Sheryl and Jodie's wedding day at Inglewood Manor in Ellesmere Port

 

What tweaks do you need to make to the service you provide?

Queer couples aren’t looking to be treated way different to all the other couples you work with.

But sometimes a little adaptation here and there goes a long way.

I hear a lot of other wedding videographers talk about ‘always mic up the groom’ (this is because it’s easier to hide a lapel microphone in a blazer than a dress).

But I’ve tweaked that line, so instead I say: ‘if one of you is wearing a suit, then I’ll mic up that person. If neither of you are, then I’ve got a different microphone I can use which works better with dresses’.

It all goes back to the assumptions. I’m not assuming who is going to be wearing what, and I’m adapting my service to fit their needs.

 

Update your website and social media

I do a lot of work with an amazing Shropshire based organisation called SAND; they work to make the ageing process easier for older LGBT+ people.

They help healthcare providers to make their services more inclusive, and one of the quotes they use is really relevant here:

“How would I know that I would feel safe and comfortable approaching your organisation for support, advice or a service?”

It’s the idea that it’s all very well you not making assumptions, or tweaking your service to make it more inclusive – but if people can’t tell from your website that you’re LGBT+ friendly, they probably won’t get in touch.

So if an LGBT+ couple don’t know you, and land on your website and instagram page for the first time, how do they know they can trust you?

Do you explicitly state you’re LGBT+ friendly? Do you use images of LGBT+ couples in your marketing materials?

Unfortunately, lots of LGBT+ couples have had homophobic experiences in the past, so you really have to make it obvious in order for them to trust you.

 

 

In case you can’t tell, it’s super important to me that wedding suppliers get this right and give queer couples an amazing experience of getting married.

So if you’ve got any questions, I’m more than happy to be a sounding board for how to make your service more inclusive.

Alternatively, if you’re getting married and looking for LGBT+ friendly suppliers, get in touch and I can chat to you about my own services, as well as point you in the direction of suppliers I love working with.

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